Fantasies
Dear Kari,
I don't know how to start this letter because the topic is relatively silly. I didn't even realize you'd given me a fucking playlist (that reads funny, lol) until this morning.
I still have never seen you naked or even topless, and I never tried to. I know I can use my imagination, but I only did that once and it was emotional more than visual.
"Well think of me again idiot"
LOL, I could have tried. I actually fell asleep aroused and woke extremely aroused because of your kindness and consideration, but I didn't do anything with it. I'm trying to give you a better understanding of what I'm like.
I'm like someone that is starving for all the good stuff that isn't sexual. You feel like the pinnacle of that for me.
I'm not super hot, but I would go to the bar expecting to be unimportant, and for example a woman I'd just met kissed me three times one night.
I got a lot of physical affection for just being myself, but what was the common factor over so many years?
Nooooo longevityyyyyy
So I don't look at you from the typical male perspective of scarcity of sexual access.
I look at how your invisible self is revealed by your words and actions.
There's nothing you and I can't discuss. You notice things about me that others don't. I'm not alone intellectually when you're there. I feel challenged to keep up with you.
So I think of how virtually everyone is having sex, but no one is enjoying the things I'm enjoying with you. Like there was a loot drop so rare that you're the only player on the server to have it. You're focused on that enjoying that item because you won't take its rareness for granted.
Playing the Kari's Advocate
Did you think I would write all of that without trying to consider how you feel and why you might have suggested I think of you naked under your clothes?
I am taking into serious consideration the possibility that you're inviting me to effectively keep you company in doing it.
🤔 I think this is probably where you were coming from, because it correlates with everything else we said:
you know I don't have to see you naked to think of you that way
you know I did it once in my own way, so why not do it again if it works?
you gave me a playlist to... help me? So we can both listen to it while we think of each other
Okay, I'm changing my mind. I feel like this is an expression of trust and feeling safe from you, and I do feel the same way. It doesn't mean we're going to treat each other differently, it's an expression of appreciation. I totally get this.
🤯 Sorry I was slow to understand. This means a lot to me and I'm blushing and I have to find a way to conceal my arousal so I can go running. 😳
I feel like it's making so much sense, now. Wow. Yes, I will only listen to your playlist when I'm thinking of you. :)
You are so sweet. My heart is permanently warmed by you. This is actually completely my style, too.
Thank you for being patient with my slowness.
I'm so excited to feel this way. 🥵
—Michael