Learning
Dear Kari,
I am learning so much that I'm slightly teary eyed from the dopamine or the absolute wonder of how much knowledge was online all this time.
My brain is finally being stimulated and challenged. I'm humbled, I'm not even close to hitting my ceiling. It's amazing how much there is to protect in an autistic world.
The feelings are so profound, I can't believe it's real. I feel like I'm in the Matrix movie but only by how mundane everything was before.
I don't understand how all of this is happening to me. I'm so different, although I still have so much work to do.
I watched these YouTube videos tonight, and many more. And read about State-Dependent Memory, and so many things I'm too lazy late at night to include.
Understanding Demand Avoidance in Autism
Why Autistics Hate Interruptions: Monotropic Thinking and Autism
Imagine having to explain all of these things about yourself.
But imagine waking up in the middle of the night and being excited to keep learning, just because I got lucky and fell into the opportunity to do it.
I went to listen to more videos as I felt myself become sleepier.
—Michael